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DUBYA INCIDENTS

Some Dubya incidents are truly worth special notice. This section of the site features those incidents. If you know of any other confirmed Dubya escapades worthy of inclusion here, please email DubyaSpeak.

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DUBYA "PLAYS BASKETBALL" IN NORTHERN IRELAND

BELFAST, Northern Ireland, Jun. 16, 2008 -- Dubya visited Lough View Integrated Primary School to shoot some hoops with students. Looking at the entertaining photos of this occasion, it is clear that what we have here is the natural sequel to Dubya playing cricket in Pakistan. Enjoy.


 

DUBYA ATTENDS OPEC APEC CONFERENCE IN AUSTRIA AUSTRALIA, MAKES ASS OF SELF

SYDNEY, Australia, Sep. 7, 2007 -- By all accounts, Dubya's appearance at the APEC Business Summit in Sydney, Australia was terribly entertaining, in the strictest sense of that expression.

Dubya started his speech off by getting the name of the organization whose event he was attending wrong:

"Uh, Mr. Prime Minister, thank you for your introduction. Thank you for being such a -- uhh, a fine host for the OPEC summit."

Although the official White House transcript doesn't record it this way, Dubya next referred to Australian Prime Minister John Howard visiting Austrian troops:

"We're givin' this young democracy the chance. It's in our interest to do so -- because, as John Howard accurately noted when he went to thank the Austrian troops there last year."

As usually happens in nearly all of Dubya's speeches, the topic of terrorism came up, and Dubya had occasion to mention the terror organization known as Jemaah Islamiyah, or JI... or Jemai-Islai-a-may-ah if you're Dubya:

"[One of] the two most dangerous terrorist networks in this region are a group called Jemai-Islai-a-may-ah, or JI."

Another exit strategy fails:
Along with stumbling through the pronunciation of words like Canberra and Kuala Lumpur, and sounding pretty tongue-tied in general, Dubya managed to conclude the appearance with a repeat performance of his failed exit strategy incident (Beijing, 2005) by marching off to the side of the stage -- where there was no exit -- only to be called back to exit from the front of the stage by Howard (shown on the left).

Perhaps the crowning image of the entire event, though, was the official summit photograph, for which all the APEC leaders were asked to raise their right hands in salute (shown above).

Dubya used his other right hand.
 

DUBYA FINDS A WAY TO USE "AL QAEDA" 95 TIMES IN ONE SPEECH

CHARLESTON, South Carolina, Jul. 24, 2007 -- Dubya visited Charleston Air Force Base to deliver a speech on his self-proclaimed "War on Terror". Apparently he wanted to connect the fight against al Qaeda to the fighting in Iraq, because he ended up mentioning al Qaeda 95 times over the course of 28 minutes. See the highlighted White House transcript for all of the details.

Also, it's interesting to note that the White House transcript suddenly changes the spelling of "al Qaeda" to "al Qaida" from Dubya's ninth utterance. Way to go!
 

"MILDLY PROFANE" DUBYA ON THE LOOSE
(Excerpt taken from the Fox News account of the incident)

WASHINGTON, D.C., Jul. 17, 2007 -- President Bush shocked Capitol Hill staffers and Republican leaders Monday when he crashed a meeting at the White House to deliver a blunt message that he wasn't backing down on Iraq and Republicans need to understand that.

"It was stunning," said one GOP aide who attended the meeting. "We couldn't believe he came in."

"We kept looking at each other, amazed he came in," said another Republican aide.

Bush was described as folksy, adamant and mildly profane as he interrupted the meeting between senior White House communications staffers Tony Snow and Ed Gillespie and GOP leaders. His message: the policy on Iraq isn't changing. He is not backing down and no one on Capitol Hill should be confused into thinking he is letting up.

[Makes one wonder how many incidents Fox News isn't reporting...]
 

DUBYA BRINGS 13-YEAR-OLD TO TEARS
(Edited excerpt taken from the Washington Times account of the incident)

CLEVELAND, Ohio, Jul. 10, 2007 -- A question for President Bush on immigration rose up like a ghost from the grave this afternoon in Ohio. Only the questioner was a 13-year-old blonde-headed girl, Jessica Hackerd, from Brecksville, Ohio, who immediately broke into tears after making her inquiry.

"Mr. President, I know immigration has been a big problem in the U.S. And what is your next step with the immigration bill?" Jessica asked Mr. Bush, during a question and answer period after a speech Mr. Bush gave to a Cleveland business group. Mr. Bush's sarcastic reply -- a wry "yeah, thanks" -- drew laughter from the crowd of 400. But the attention caused young Jessica, who characterized herself in an interview afterward as very shy, to immediately tear up.

"No, it's a great question. No, I appreciate that," Mr. Bush said, as he saw Jessica's reaction. Jessica, in the interview, said that she was crying because she was nervous. But when the president's sarcastic answer was mentioned, she said, "I heard that, too."

Mr. Bush went on to speak more than 1,100 words about the death of his proposed comprehensive immigration reform, which was a heavy blow when it fell apart last month. But Jessica, there with her parents and younger sister, continued to wipe tears from her eyes for several minutes, and midway through his answer, Mr. Bush again tried to encourage the distraught youngster without drawing too much attention to her.

"It's a great question by the way, and I'm glad you asked it," Mr. Bush said.

[Note: The White House transcript of this appearance converts Dubya's sarcastic "Yeah, thanks..." to "Yes, thanks." but does keep the "(Laughter.)" notation intact. How nice.]
 

NEW POPE, SAME DUBYA
(Reprint of an article posted on South Africa's News24.com)

VATICAN CITY, Jun. 9, 2007 -- President George W Bush drew gasps at the Vatican on Saturday by referring to Pope Benedict XVI as "sir" instead of the expected "His Holiness", pool reporters said.

They could clearly hear the US leader say "Yes, sir" when the pope asked him if he was going to meet with officials of the lay Catholic Sant'Egidio community at the US embassy later during his visit.

A handful of pool reporters were on hand as Benedict greeted Bush at the door of his private library ahead of a private audience of about half an hour.

On his way to see the 80-year-old pontiff, the US leader apparently recognised someone he knew, and could be heard greeting the person with a casual "How ya doin'?"

The pool reporters also noted Bush's relaxed posture, crossing his legs "Texan style" while facing the pope across his desk in the private study of the apostolic palace.

Dubya's difficulty with Vatican protocol has been seen on these pages before: 1 | 2
 

POLITICAL THEATER

WHITE HOUSE, Mar. 23, 2007 -- With apparently no sense for the ironic, Dubya assembled a group of veterans, soldiers and family members of active-duty soldiers behind him in the Diplomatic Reception Room of the White House, with flags and a portrait of George Washington on display, and invited the press, so that he could decry congressional Democrats for what he termed "an act of political theater".
 

ONLY IN AMERICUS
(Excerpt taken from the CNN transcript of a report made from Americus, Georgia on Mar. 3, 2007)

FREDRICKA WHITFIELD, CNN ANCHOR: Hello and you're in the Newsroom on this Saturday, March 3rd, I'm Fredricka Whitfield. We begin the day in the south, specifically Americus, Georgia, site of that deadly tornado this week. The second stop on a heart breaking trip. President Bush arrived just a short time ago in South Georgia where nine people died in Thursday's tornadoes. CNN senior correspondent Allan Chernoff joins us now from Americus, Georgia. Allan?

ALLAN CHERNOFF, CNN CORRESPONDENT: Fredricka, the president just left here a few minutes ago. And the president did take a look at some of the worst devastation here. He went over and met with people who live here, whose homes were absolutely destroyed. He seemed quite compassionate in talking with them and certainly telling them that the government is going to try to provide assistance over here. Afterwards, he did meet with the county sheriff, Pete Smith, the sheriff of Sumter County. And the sheriff said to him, I listened to the tape just a moment ago, he said we have got to get the people help here, get them back on their feet. He said we're doing everything we can, but we need some help. And the president responded by saying, well, the state's working on an assessment, they'll get the request into the federal government and they'll turn it around quickly to help the people down here. And then the president went on to say, he would like to see groups like Habitat for Humanity get down here, come down here, that's an exact quote. Afterwards, the sheriff reminded the president that Habitat for Humanity, in fact, is based right here in Americus. Following that, the president said, well, I would like them to come around the corner and start building homes because, of course, the federal government can provide some aid, and he said there clearly are some people he met who don't have insurance. So they're going to need help from those volunteers. And he said that's really the best help that anyone can get. Having neighbors come over, give a hand and try to rebuild homes. Fredricka?

WHITFIELD: All right, Allan Chernoff thanks so much, from Americus, Georgia.
 

DUBYA CREATES BEDLAM AT CATERPILLAR FACTORY
(Reprint of the Newsweek.com write-up)

PEORIA, Illinois, Jan. 30, 2007 -- Does President Bush have it in for the press corps? Touring a Caterpillar factory in Peoria, Ill., the Commander in Chief got behind the wheel of a giant tractor and played chicken with a few wayward reporters. Wearing a pair of stylish safety glasses -- at least more stylish than most safety glasses -- Bush got a mini-tour of the factory before delivering remarks on the economy. "I would suggest moving back," Bush said as he climbed into the cab of a massive D-10 tractor. "I'm about to crank this sucker up." As the engine roared to life, White House staffers tried to steer the press corps to safety, but when the tractor lurched forward, they too were forced to scramble for safety. "Get out of the way!" a news photographer yelled. "I think he might run us over!" said another. White House aides tried to herd the reporters the right way without getting run over themselves. Even the Secret Service got involved, as one agent began yelling at reporters to get clear of the tractor. Watching the chaos below, Bush looked out the tractor's window and laughed, steering the massive machine into the spot where most of the press corps had been positioned. The episode lasted about a minute, and Bush was still laughing when he pulled to a stop. He gave reporters a thumbs-up. "If you've never driven a D-10, it's the coolest experience," Bush said afterward. Yeah, almost as much fun as seeing your life flash before your eyes.
 

DUBYA GETS LEI'D

HONOLULU, Nov. 20, 2006 -- Dubya's arrival at Hickam Air Force Base in Honolulu, Hawaii created an inexplicably awkward moment, as Freedom Corps volunteer Eloise Monsarrat tried to place a lei around Dubya's neck. Fortunately there were cameras to capture to magic.

 

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